Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Where is the love? (THIS BLOG IS RATED NC-17!!)

Seriously everyone. I really want to know. The sequence of events that has occured over the last week has really made me wonder.

Joel informs me that a kid that came into town for Slaughterama asked him why we had so many shitty books at the event in Austin, TX. Really? We provide free books and you really feel like it is appropriate to tell the Intern that they are shitty? Maybe they are, but I bet if we were giving out free 40's you wouldn't ask why the beer was so shitty.

I moved the bus into my backyard the other day in order to load it with my furniture the next morning to move out of my house. Upon waking up and beginning to get to work, I notice a note on the windshield of the bus that says "Thank you note". I open it to find that it was quite a thank you note as it read:

"Hey! Thanks for running over my f--n' trash can and not picking it up, you worthless douche! If you ever do this again I'm going to break a beer bottle off in your a-----! xoxo, Jim".

First, I think I would have notice if I hit a trash can. It was NOT the first time I have ever driven the bus. And what?, did Jim my friendly neighbor find evidence of his trash on the wheels of the bus and know it was me? Its not like I'm the only one that uses the alley. And if I did it, I promise I would have picked up the trash can and every piece of Jim's trash. Sigh.

And then today was the tops. I get to work and the first email I read, sent by "Annoyed in Richmond", says:

"Please move your buses. They are right in front of my home and are not only taking up all the parking spaces for those who actually live here, they are blocking my morning sun. Do you live in these buses? Why did you park buses full of broken furniture and other such crap in front of my house? Move them or I will ask the city to do so."

Unfortunately, said emailer doesn't realize that I am a new homeowner on the block and soon to be their neighbor for life. I know the buses are huge and I swear I'm try to get unpacked as soon as possible so they can go back to their home at the Bike Lot. This is an awkward start to the new home.

I'm sad, folks. Sorry for all the profanity in this one. Sorry the buses are so big. Sorry there are so many passive aggressive people in the world who really like to write notes without their names or giving the option to communicate in person. My phone number is on the website CALL ME IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM! Seriously!! I love talking! I love real live human interactions! We can chat, relax, get to know one another....that's so much nicer.


No comments: